Episode 121: Locales: Myanmar

Posted on September 8, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

“Old cows like young grass.”
– Myanmar proverb

The proverb really has nothing to do with our episode, but, darn, Myanmar, you speak the truth.

In this installment of Locales, we discuss Myanmar the Golden Land. In true Idle Red Hands fashion, we don’t just Google it; we put a man on the ground. Lyal comes back from Myanmar to augment Chris’s and Wayne’s exhaustive research. Oh, Lyal gets all coy because his wife was in the room. Yes, he was talking about the sex industry. It really couldn’t be any clearer.

Episode 120: Warriors: Apache

Posted on August 30, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

“It is better to have less thunder in the mouth and more lightning in the hand.”
– Apache proverb

The warpath
When lightning strikes, bows and war clubs gleamin’
No sunshine, no Geronimo dreamin’
The cavalry roamin’ on the loose, you got juice
Up for abuse, when Chiricahua is induced
So suck along, rock on, the brain waves

What you clocking, I’d be tomahawking, you get maimed
The games you play, look up and say you want to change
And rearrange, the strange, you never go the way
Don’t look back, forget that, you need that
Just sit back, look at the show, and see that

In this installment of warriors, we look at the Apache. Are we just thunder in the mouth?

It is better to have less thunder in the mouth and more lightning in the hand.

Episode 119: Endings

Posted on August 17, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

“You know, the only thing that matters is the ending. It’s the most important part of the story.”
—Mort, Secret Window

So, why leave it up to your players? Kidding.

In this Waynelss episode, Chris and Lyal discuss the different types of endings you can have in your game. This episode seems better than usual for some reason. We can’t figure it out, though.

Episode 118: Literature Lessons: George R. R. Martin

Posted on August 6, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

GM: After reading A Song of Ice and Fire, I’ve been thinking of making our campaign more “Martinesque”.
Player: George R. R. Martin? You mean the guy that kills off his main characters? It sounds like you’re just looking for an excuse to run a player-killer campaign.
GM: …
Player: Seriously. What else would make a game “Martinesque”?
GM: Uh, complex relationships, like the one between Jaime and Cersei. You said your PC has a sister, right?
Player: …

In this installment of Literature Lessons, we discuss how to make your games more Martinesque. However, despite the delay with this episode, we have no plans to make our upload schedule Martinesque.

Episode 117: RPG Rookies: Pathfinder

Posted on July 18, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

Today’s a training day, new player. Show you around; give you a taste of the business. I got 4 games pending people’s schedules, 3 active campaigns, another 25 in my notes that I can’t think of a decent act two for. I GM five players. That’s five different personalities. Five sets of problems. You can be number six if you act now. But I ain’t holding no hands, okay? I ain’t baby-sitting. You got today and today only to show me who and what you’re made of. You don’t like Scottish accents, get the frak away from my table. Go get you a nice, wimpy desk game, chasing Mario’s kart or something, you hear me?

In our second installment of RPG Rookies, we go over the things players and gamemasters need to discuss when starting up a new game, using our upcoming Pathfinder game as an example.

Episode 116: Magic: Rune Magic

Posted on June 24, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

Know how to cut them, know how to read them,
Know how to stain them, know how to prove them,
Know how to evoke them, know how to score them,
Know how to send them; know how to spend them
— Havamal

Our fourth installment of Magic deals with runes, the power associated with them, and how you can bring this often underused form of magic into your games. Although we mostly define runes as the letters used to write various Germanic languages before the adoption of the Latin alphabet, we do mention a few other forms of magical writing systems.

Wayne brings up D&D Next again, but (surprisingly) doesn’t rant about it. Meanwhile Chris does rant, just not about anything game related, and Lyal provides tips on how to enjoy Dungeons & Dragons 3: Book of Vile Darkness.

Episode 115: Creature Feature: Sin-Eaters

Posted on June 14, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

Have a bunch of hungry of listeners and only one hour to prepare? Well, if you have a corpse in the fridge and a few human foibles in the cupboard, you can satisfy even the most demanding guest with this zesty variation of our Creature Feature series.

Sin-eater Steaks

1 corpse, brined in the tears of a condemned man
a splash of wasted ability
seven vulgarities, diced
1 cup of the last words of a dying man (For a low-fat alternative, use the last words of a toddler.)

Cover the corpse in a sauce made from the ingredients.
Pass through the flames of Hell until the sinner recants or the meat is pink in the middle.
Slice into steaks and serve with sprigs of parsley, uh, from the damned.

Actual Play: Monsterhearts

Posted on June 4, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

The evil Elder Gods of Real Life have raised their tentacled heads again, making recording and editing a regular episode for this week problematic. Instead, we’re bringing you the next part of our Monsterhearts game, being MCed for us by Chris. If you haven’t done so already, please check out part one where we introduce the characters and give a recap of what’s happened in the story so far.

Please be aware that this episode is largely uncut and unedited, and contains both adult language and adult situations. Listener discretion is advised.

Episode 114: Weapons: Long Guns

Posted on May 28, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

Our second installment of Weapons looks at the role long guns (muskets, arquebuses, rifles, carbines and shotguns) in battle, society and games. It is also our first drinking game episode*.

Take a drink:
Whenever you hear the words “trade-off” or “interesting”.
Whenever “cavalry” is pronounced “Calvary”.
Take a shot:
Whenever Chris mentions his daughter. (I think we cut those out.)
Whenever Lyal makes a mistake. (I’m pretty sure he cut those out.)
Chug while:
Wayne complains about D&D Next. (You’ll probably tune those out. We do.)

*We highly recommend non-alcoholic drinks – otherwise this game would probably kill off most of the audience.

Episode 113: PvP Games

Posted on May 18, 2013 by Idle Red Hands

With Lyal unavailable to record this week, Chris and Wayne talk about something they do almost constantly: intra-party fighting. We discuss player vs. player conflicts, both in games designed to pit the characters against each other and in games where they’re expected to act as a team. We use The Hunger Games (which Chris finally found the time to watch) and The Avengers as our running examples. While we try not to give away any big secrets, there may be a few minor spoilers for these movies in the episode.